The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXXII

So, I decided to take a bit of a break from sharing the lame-ass emails I have been getting from ‘men of interest’ online . . . just so that everyone doesn’t think that I am a total bitch all of the time. But, I got one email this week that just begged to be included in the series . . . some asses are just too good to keep to myself.

This email came from a loser on the dating web site that I use . . . he is 49, divorced, and the father of FOUR! Apparently, when he isn’t busy propagating the species, he trolls the Internet for women to attack. I think he got a bit more than he bargained for when he made his personal mission to help this girl out. Suckerbunny!

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From: Asshat
To: Jenny
Date: Sep. 4, 3020 – 8:32 am
Subject: A mission to help you out…

A shame that such a potentially good profile is marred with a lack of humility or sensitivity. No, I am not interested, but felt that I absolutely had to let you know how you come across, and it's not positive. I am sure you are a nice girl, but demanding, pompous writing will only get you weak, spineless weirdos who are attracted to a facsimile of their mother. If I am wrong, please forgive my intrusion, but you should consider turning the bitch-o-meter down just a tad ( if you are brutally honest, then you will appreciate the same). Good luck with your search.

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From: Jenny
To: Asshat
Date: Sep. 4, 3020 – 9:10 pm
Subject: Re: A mission to help you out…

It's amazing that a geriatric wanna-be player thinks that there is a problem with my profile. The reality is that someone as pathetic as you could never live up to even the most meager of my expectations. Inasmuch as you think your email was helpful, it isn't - because I am quite confident that no one cares what you think . . . especially not me.

Just a helpful hint for you, coming across as a total douche bag isn't attractive . . . just because you could NEVER handle a woman that is independent, assertive, and strong does not mean that you should attack them. I am sure that your now ex-wife left your sorry ass behind because you tried to keep her barefoot, pregnant, and silent in your home.

Your Neanderthal opinion is not welcome here. In the future, you would be well-advised to keep your asshat comments to yourself until someone solicits them . . . otherwise, your old ass will never find another sorry sucker to marry. One last thing . . . do the world a favor and stop breeding. You are just damaging the world by continuing to spread yourself about.

And, in case you didn’t figure it out yet, I’m not interested either . . . and am blocking you from contacting me again with more of your Alzheimer-induced rantings.

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Follow-Up: So, I blocked this man from emailing me again . . . not a surprise because I told him I was going to. He is such a total wackadoodle that he actually created another profile in order to respond to my message. His response?

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From: Asshat2
To: Jenny
Date: Sep. 6, 3020 – 7:10 pm
Subject: Still trying to help you out…

You know you come across as a total cunt. You are going to have to block everyone on the site if you keep that attitude. Fat girls are rumored to be nice. Not the case with you. Oh well. Your loss.

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From: Jenny
To: Asshat2
Date: Sep. 6, 3020 – 8:22 pm
Subject: Re: Still trying to help you out…

Wow! You are even more pathetic than I ever envisioned! You should be so proud of yourself . . . because you have just won a place in my Hall of Shame blog series. And I may even put a link to your active profile so that everyone can see what a giant piece of shit you are!

Just a few thoughts . . . you know, to help a guy out.

You can’t use the word cunt . . . if there is anyone here that epitomizes that word, it would be you. Clearly you have been emasculated by someone in your life. You should not take out your issues with your mother on me.

Additionally, I am quite all right with continuing to block the mentally challenged men on this site. If I wanted to settle for spending my life with a waste of skin, I could gladly do that. But, since I have self-respect, confidence, and intelligence on my side, that isn’t necessary. You, however, should consider switching teams. I think that there is a great man out there that could rape you into submission – or at least help you to form some general human decency.

Last, but certainly not least, all fat women are not nice. Some of us do not have to be nice . . . because we are beautiful in our own right. I can be a total bitch and still have men lining up around the block to be with me. Whoever told you that fat chicks are nice clearly didn’t spend much time around them. We will kick your sorry ass to the curb after five seconds. Why is that? Because we can ALWAYS do better . . . and, in your case, it wouldn’t be hard. I know men in prison that are better people than you are.

Now . . . I am going to report your emails to me as abusive to the site administrator. And your IP address will get blocked from further damaging the real women on this web site – of which none of them would be interested in anything to do with you. Unless you count wanting to castrate you. I totally volunteer to lead that pack . . .

Now fuck off!

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Final Follow-Up: This loser and his accounts were deactivated from the web site . . . and his IP address was blocked from creating additional accounts. I know that is a small victory - because you can always switch IP addresses . . . but it was at least something! One less loser was at least temporarily removed from the site. Go Jenny!