The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXXI

Oh baby! Do I have a Hall of Shame loser to share with you this round. I honestly cannot believe the people that email me with ‘interest’ on the dating site I use. Don’t get me wrong, I think the site is good overall . . . but I am seriously starting to wonder about the general sanity of the male species. I keep waiting for the day when I get an email that makes me all warm and fuzzy . . . in the interim, I get them that make me throw up in my mouth. Read on for the jerk of the week!

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From: SlimyWeasel
To: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 1:12 am
Subject: Wat U Du 2 Me!

Ur nu picturz get me turnd on! U get hawter every time. Hit me back n we can get 2gethr.

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To: SlimyWeasel
From: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 8:20 am
Subject: Re: Wat U Du 2 Me!

Mmm . . . I’m going to go with a vehement ‘no’. And you really should type in complete sentences so that people can understand the message you are trying to convey. Emailing in text language is ridiculous for a 37 year old.

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From: SlimyWeasel
To: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 11:43 am
Subject: Re: Wat U Du 2 Me!

U kinda bitchy. I likez that mami. Du u wanna kno what I did last night?

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To: SlimyWeasel
From: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 4:11 pm
Subject: Re: Wat U Du 2 Me!

I’m kind of bitchy? You have no idea how bitchy I am . . . you have yet to scratch the surface. And NO I do not want to know what you did last night. Get lost!

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From: SlimyWeasel
To: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 8:21 pm
Subject: Re: Wat U Du 2 Me!

U make me hawt! Dat nu picture was fine! I prntd all ur pictures n came all over ur purty face. I no dat makes u want me.

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To: SlimyWeasel
From: Jenny
Date: July 28, 2010 10:14 pm
Subject: Re: Wat U Du 2 Me!

Oh my god! You are a filthy pig . . . and that does not make me want you, it makes me vomit in my mouth. I am physically ill at the very thought of someone engaging in such a lewd behavior. I can’t even imagine what sort of lowlife individual would behave like that, let alone admit it to the person that they victimized. But, in doing so, you sealed your fate of being blocked so that I never have to see your ugly face again – or hear from you.

Just a couple of take home points – because I am all about educating the masses:

1) You are way, way too old to be writing and acting like a ghetto teenager. Clean yourself up or prepare to be single for the remainder of your sorry life. Although, that being said, it would be the most decent thing you could do for the general population.

2) Stop calling every woman you come into any sort of contact with ‘mami’. I’m nobody’s mother – let alone a freakzoid pervert like you.

3) The very thought of you having your way with yourself while looking at my pictures is absolutely revolting. Clearly you have a sad and pathetic life if you have to get off while looking at pictures of a stranger. Let me recommend something to you . . . it’s called porn. Women that are in porn love when you do that. Classy women like me do not. We consider losers like you to be depraved.

4) No one wants you . . . and finding out about your extracurricular activities only reinforces that fact. Just be glad that God blessed you with two hands . . . you don’t have to worry about a partner. You are your own lover . . . keep it that way . . . and, whatever you do, do not procreate!

5) Telling a stranger about your perversions is never a good idea. And since you elected to do it, I am going to share it with the public. I’m forwarding your message to the moderator of the web site to get your foul self removed. And then I am going to share your message with all of my friends. Know why? Cause I’m kinda bitchy!

Jenny OUT!!!!