The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXXIV

Ha ha ha ha ha . . . boy was I having a bad day when I emailed this janker! But, he did deserve it . . .

This jackoff was from the dating site that I have a profile on. The site has been good (overall), but these crackheads squeak through with frightening regularity.

So, be warned that the message contains some level of inflammatory comments, including foul language, politically incorrect references to mentally challenged individuals, and attacks on the residents of New Jersey. Please don’t think that I dislike all people in Jersey . . . just those that act like the cast of Jersey Shore. My favorite guy at the moment happens to be from New Jersey and he is nothing like those meatheads!

Enjoy!!! And I did block him . . . you know I had to. Boy did I poke that bear! ;)

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From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 8:34 pm
Subject: Hi

Hi

***

From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:02 pm
Subject: Hi

Hello . . . thanks for your message. How goes it?

I checked out your profile and you seem to be rather varied in your interests. Can I ask what captured your attention about my profile?

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From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:14 pm
Subject: tony

it goes good... call me now 609 647 1**5

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From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:40 pm
Subject: tony

I don't really call people before getting to know them online...I am conservative like that. Did you see my second question in the initial email? I did notice that you mentioned you are always drawn towards older women - of which I am not one since you are five years older than I am. I am interested to know . . .

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From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:54 pm
Subject: tony

u seem like a total fuckin bitch

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From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 10:15 pm
Subject: tony

Oh lovely . . . Prince Charming is alive and now residing in New Jersey!! Clearly you are as you initially appeared to be – nothing but Jersey trash!

So, in an effort to do you a public service, let me bring a few items to your attention. And don’t worry, I will use common language . . . I know Neanderthal’s do not have a big vocabulary.

1) If you advertise yourself as someone that is solely interested in older women, why are you contacting women younger than you? Or did you not even take the time to check the age listed on my profile? Regardless, the fact that you are into cougars shows that you have serious ‘mommy’ issues that neither I, nor any woman with cognitive powers, would be interested in dealing with. I am sure though that there is a 65 year old woman out there just waiting for you to verbally thrash her. Maybe she can hit you with her cane!

2) If you are really interested in getting to know someone, read the emails that they send back to you. And, braniac, if they ask you a question . . . answer it! What a novel concept! I am not a whore, so I am not going to call you after two one line emails. What would that accomplish? Giving you an opportunity to abuse your two inches of screaming thunder? I don’t think so . . . I am sure there are hookers standing on the corner outside of your Jersey home that can help you out with that for ten dollars.

2) Jersey Shore isn’t looking for additional cast mates. You need to ditch the spray tan, puffy hair, wifebeater, and gold chains. You are 39 years old . . . you look like a retard! And I KNOW that I am not the only one that has told you that. Maybe, just maybe, you should consider a makeover! You are mentally challenged, so maybe a department store out there could hook you up. I have a friend at the Goodwill that I could put you in touch with. What they come up with couldn’t be any worse than the look you are rocking now!

3) NJ Cute Guy? Really? Who told you that? Your momma? Because she is the only one that would find your appearance in any way cute . . . so if you are trying to own the ‘GTL’, I would recommend that you spend a little more time in the gym so that you can get rid of the beer gut. And, clearly, you need to spend considerably little less time in the tanning booth. Oompa-Loompa’s have nothing on you! Freaking orange trash nightmare that you are! Laundry? Yeah . . . the stain on your collar in your picture just validates that you are a filthy pig.

4) Don’t give out your telephone number to women that you are going to verbally abuse! That just shows your complete inability to plan ahead. Now, what should I do with that number? Hmmm hmmm . . . guess you will find out when your phone blows up with calls related to this email (because you have now earned yourself a spot in my Hall of Shame blog series). I will be featuring you! What a great honor for a Jersey boy!

Now that I have shared my wisdom with you, I would suggest that you head out and change your cell phone number . . . because you have no idea the beast you awakened with your foul response to me.

Burn in hell!
~Jenny~