The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXXVII

It has been forever since I felt truly compelled to blast someone out of the water and document their stupidity in my Hall of Shame blog series. In an effort to be a better (and more positive) person, I have been attempting to control myself. That did not work so well for me yesterday . . . as I was provoked beyond bearing.

I keep a great deal of my personal life private. Know why that is? Because some people – who are of no true consequence in my life – feel entitled to be intimately involved in everything that I do. The Internet has allowed people to have an unparalleled sense of entitlement. Just because I can post every picture that I take in the world does not mean that I should. Just because I can update my Facebook status every five seconds, with every breath and every ass wipe, does not mean that I should. Just because I can ‘check in’ online so that every stalker in the world knows I have been to the Acme and then to the Wawa before checking in from home, does not mean that I should. Don’t get me wrong, I have no issue with people that do those things . . . it just is not the way I elect to run my life.

Who is the janker that pissed in my Cheerios yesterday? A male acquaintance . . . who I have met peripherally a few times in one of the social circles I operate in. And when I say acquaintance, that is what I mean . . . no true personal affiliation . . . he does not even have my cell phone number and must have gotten my email address from my Facebook page.

So, I get an email, completely out of nowhere from this person, and it rapidly went from bad to worse for him. Read on . . . and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed letting him have it!

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From: JankerDuJuor
To: Jenny
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 5:20 PM
Subject: Question

Why does your Facebook say you are in a relationship? You aren’t.

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From: Jenny
To: JankerDuJuor
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 6:04 PM
Subject: RE: Question

Mmm . . . because I am in a relationship.

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From: JankerDuJuor
To: Jenny
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 6:17 PM
Subject: RE: Question

No. I see you all of the time. Never with anyone. Trying to prove something by saying that?

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From: Jenny
To: JankerDuJuor
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 6:25 PM
Subject: RE: Question

I don’t have anything to prove. My relationship status is listed correctly. And I have nothing to prove to anyone – especially not you.

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From: JankerDuJuor
To: Jenny
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 6:33 PM
Subject: RE: Question

Yeah right. I think you just say that so you don’t look bad.

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From: Jenny
To: JankerDuJuor
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 6:45 PM
Subject: RE: Question

First of all, there isn’t anything wrong with being single. I don’t have to say that I am in a relationship to feel better about myself. The last time that I checked, I am pretty phenomenal – single or involved.

It does occur to me that you have taken a specific objection to my status. Not that I care, but what business is it of yours anyway?

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From: JankerDuJuor
To: Jenny
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 7:10 PM
Subject: RE: Question

No objection. Just like to see people being honest. And I don’t think you are.

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From: Jenny
To: JankerDuJuor
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 7:22 PM
Subject: RE: Question

You don’t think I am being honest? Really . . . that is profound coming from someone like you. Your issue with me isn’t going to be used to mask your latent homosexuality . . . if you think that people do not know, you are grossly mistaken. We all have eyes. If you are looking for someone dishonest, look no further than your own living room. Your entire life is a lie . . .

That being said, don’t make the mistake of thinking that I care one whit. Pussy or dick, it’s all the same to me. But, don’t try to push off your personal insecurities and issues onto me. That isn’t going to work. Now get lost before I get nasty.

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From: JankerDuJuor
To: Jenny
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 7:36 PM
Subject: RE: Question

Get nasty? You say things like that and pretend you are still a nice person. You have everyone fooled. One day you will get what is coming to you.

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From: Jenny
To: JankerDuJuor
Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 7:41 PM
Subject: RE: Question

Well, you should have let it be . . . but since you are clearly not that bright, I am going to share a few home truths with you. Maybe you will think about these things before you try and confront someone else with your retarded accusations again. And, I would like to thank you ahead of time for pissing me off and earning a place in my Hall of Shame blog. It’s been a while, but I think you are deserving. Congrats!

1. What happens in my personal life is just that – personal. It isn’t any business of yours – or anyone else’s. I don’t owe you an explanation related to my relationship. What are you? The relationship police?!? Please! Get a life of your own and you won’t be so concerned with what is going on in mine.
2. If you weren’t queerer than a two-headed nickel, I would think that you were interested in me and just spouting off sour grapes because you can’t have me. I won’t ever understand why you have elected to single me out to be the recipient of your mad ranting, but I also won’t pretend to care. You are nothing to me – and you are now even less than that. I have enemies I look upon with more fondness.
3. My boyfriend thinks you are pathetic. We laughed about your email together . . . and he reminded me that I really don’t have anything to prove. But, I will say that if you paid any attention at all to my page, you would know who my boyfriend is . . . what he does for a career . . . where he lives . . . and even when I am with him. You are just too single-minded (and lacking in cognitive powers) to notice these things.
4. I have people fooled? Really? I don’t think that is the case. I know who – and what – I am. It is a shame that you live such a closeted (literally!) life that you cannot even recognize someone that is truly well-grounded, honest (to the point of it being a fault), and true. Yes – true! Because that is what I am to the people that mean the most to me. Trash like you? Well, there is always another Hefty bag to shove you into.
5. I am a nice person – I am exceedingly nice to the people in my life that deserve it. You may not like me . . . you may not like my personal politics . . . and you may not like what I have to say. But I do not recall asking you for your opinion. I don’t recall soliciting you as a Facebook ‘friend’ and I really don’t recall initiating this conversation with you. If you want to see someone ugly, grab a mirror. You are foul . . . not only on the outside, but on the inside. I don’t see even one redeemable quality about you.
6. Let’s just clear up one other item . . . we have friends in common. You will do well to keep a wide berth from me going forward. Your disgustingness has been removed from my Facebook page and blocked. And, let me warn you, don’t make the mistake of trying to badmouth me to our mutual friends. I had them long before you did . . . and will have them long after you have hit the beaten path. I don’t lose . . . especially not to a punk like you.
7. Lastly, I will get what is coming to me in life . . . and that is solely because I am a wonderful person. I will have happiness . . . I will have security . . . and I will have love. Somehow I see you growing old alone . . . dying alone . . . and being buried by the state (hopefully sooner versus later). I have none of those concerns about my very bright and shining future.

All of that being said, I will not bother to wish you well. You are not deserving of it.

Jenny