So, I do not normally post these blogs in such rapid succession . . . but this TOOL completely deserved to get his moment in the spotlight.
Here’s the scenario . . . we have been exchanging casual emails for a couple of weeks now and his ‘office’ was allegedly closed today, so we had more of an opportunity to communicate. Yeah . . . that wasn’t a good thing. I am not going to post the entire conversation, but I behaved in my emails to him the way that I normally do. I am relatively honest, but kept things casual – especially in light of the fact that he has posted very prominently in his profile that he wants to become friends before progressing to anything else. I am completely respectful of that . . . but it does make me a little bit leery of his actual status and intentions. Most guys are not looking for friends on a dating site . . . and if they say they are, they are probably lying. This guy was . . .
Here is my disclaimer before you read this:
1. I love people that have tattoos and I am not judgemental of them. But, piss me off and see what I have to say to you.
2. I have loads of friends that are single parents and I do not judge them, nor consider their children born out of wedlock to be bastards. But if you show disregard for your child, I will . . . and will not be quiet about it.
3. I do not consider anyone stupid or uneducated until they prove that to me through their words or actions.
Now that I have made my disclaimer, check out the email chain from my loser of the day!
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 10:35 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
I just wanted to let you know that. And I was a boy scout, so you know I am only speaking the truth.
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 10:45 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
That is kind of you to say . . .
As a Boy Scout, did you have to take some sort of oath that would ensure that you are unable to lie?
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 10:55 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
So, wassup?
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:02 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
Nothing profound . . . I shoveled out my car earlier and am now making chili for dinner later. What are you up to?
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:05 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
lol if you wanna know something ask .... you know what it is talking about yourself ~
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:08 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
Mmm . . . okay . . . I thought I asked a question there. So, why don’t you tell me what it is you do for a living. Your profile was non-specific about it.
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:11 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
Yes upon request , lol . Well I work in an office and I take care of myself
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:13 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
Ah . . . okay . . . still non-specific. Not really an answer at all.
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:15 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
Why don’t you just call me and we can get specific.
Are you down to earth ... we are typing but i sense a bit of ...well uppityness lol
Sorry im upfront and blunt no reason to think it and not say it ...right?
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:17 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
I am a down to earth type of person. I'm not sure why you would think I am uppity . . . I know who and what I am and don't make apologies for it. If you think I am arrogant because I am conservative then that is up to you to decide. It won't change who I am.
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:22 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
LOL it is not what your saying but how your saying ... who asked to change you , lol , i dont kno why ur saying that ... you seem uptight also i guess . Down to earth to me is being able to enjoy one anothers convos and be able to talk about anything ~
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:24 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
You are entitled to your perception . . . I thought we were having a relatively open dialogue.
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:28 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
Dialogue?? Yes I know the meaning but who uses it really?? Look I dont think we are a match plus I think your lying about ur age , lol .
uppity , snobby , w/e you call it ....its there loosen up and have fun sweets ~
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:32 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
You think I am lying about my age? How old do you think I am?
Very odd . . . but I'll take being snobby I guess. Apparently being educated is a bad thing in your world.
And no one lies about being 35. That's ridiculous!
***
From: PhillyPflunkie
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:38 am
Subject: You have a beautiful smile
My "world"?
So I have no education and you exceed my level ?? Would never happen.
you look older, much, much older~
***
From: Jenny
To: PhillyPflunkie
Date: Dec. 27, 2010 – 11:50 am
Subject: Re: You have a beautiful smile
Wow . . . you are very angry for a middle-aged white man, now aren’t you? You went from zero to sixty in about ten seconds flat there.
Let me enlighten you about a few things before I release you to the universe and block your disgusting ass from contacting me again. Maybe, just maybe, you will learn something and not be a complete TOOL the next time you contact a woman on this site.
1) If you will not even explain what you do for a job, it makes women think you do not have one. No one was asking you for the name of the company you work for, just the nature of it. Get a grip on yourself . . . you know you are unemployed and living with your mommy. And your ‘office’ is your basement bedroom. Oh! And since you allegedly live in King of Prussia, I am sure your office was not closed. We only got about six inches of snow. Janker!
2) The topic of your daughter is “off-limits” according to you, yet you have her picture posted on your dating profile. What an ass you are! If you do not want people to ask about her, take down the damn picture. Fool!
3) You are single, not divorced, and you were very specific about that at several points in your profile. Just something to consider . . . by doing so, you are announcing to the world (repeatedly) that your child is a bastard . . . and that you are too. You clearly have no concept of birth control or at least did not have the decency to marry her mother (who you are not very complimentary of in your profile). Yet, you still think you are some sort of God. Well, let me enlighten you that you are not. Being able to create a child and bring them into the world doesn’t make you anything other than a careless jerk. And if you aren’t happy with the woman that is your child’s mother, it is your own damn fault for having sex with her to begin with. That also should remind you of what a fool you are.
4) Your tattoos are not sexy. Only a deviant would find them so and I find it next to impossible to believe that you could work in any ‘office’ with tattoos on your face, neck and with full sleeves. Step away from the crack pipe and get a grip on reality. If you were smarter (which clearly you are not), you would pass yourself off as a construction worker. That is about the only work you could do in Pennsylvania looking that way. Because, in case you missed it, we are a very conservative state . . . all about professionalism. That star tattoo on your face makes you look like the jack donkey that you are.
5) Age . . . a very sensitive issue for women. Luckily, I know I look damn good for my age, so I am completely unconcerned with your opinion. Especially in light of the fact that you did such horrible damage to your own appearance with the tattoos, tanning, and what appears to be a lifetime of smoking – if the wrinkles on your alleged 37 year old face are anything to go by. I have seen smaller grooves in the Grand Canyon! Look in the mirror before casting dispersions on others.
6) Last, but certainly not least, you know you are uneducated. Let’s not try to kid one another here . . . you have nothing to offer anyone. You are a single father, a tattooed freak, and abusive to women. If I seem “uppity” to you, it is because you are so far beneath me on every single level, that you could never do anything but look up to me. And I am down with being snobby. It protects me from the dregs of society – people like you. Clearly, you struck a wrong note with me . . . and I am sure you will continue to do so with every woman you come into contact with. Know what I recommend? Sterilization . . . isolation . . . and education. Three things for you to work on. Get to it . . .
I’m off now . . . I wish you the very worst! Miserable New Year!!!
Jenny
P.S. You have been blocked from contacting me . . . don’t waste your precious brain cells trying to respond.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXXIV
Ha ha ha ha ha . . . boy was I having a bad day when I emailed this janker! But, he did deserve it . . .
This jackoff was from the dating site that I have a profile on. The site has been good (overall), but these crackheads squeak through with frightening regularity.
So, be warned that the message contains some level of inflammatory comments, including foul language, politically incorrect references to mentally challenged individuals, and attacks on the residents of New Jersey. Please don’t think that I dislike all people in Jersey . . . just those that act like the cast of Jersey Shore. My favorite guy at the moment happens to be from New Jersey and he is nothing like those meatheads!
Enjoy!!! And I did block him . . . you know I had to. Boy did I poke that bear! ;)
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 8:34 pm
Subject: Hi
Hi
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:02 pm
Subject: Hi
Hello . . . thanks for your message. How goes it?
I checked out your profile and you seem to be rather varied in your interests. Can I ask what captured your attention about my profile?
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:14 pm
Subject: tony
it goes good... call me now 609 647 1**5
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:40 pm
Subject: tony
I don't really call people before getting to know them online...I am conservative like that. Did you see my second question in the initial email? I did notice that you mentioned you are always drawn towards older women - of which I am not one since you are five years older than I am. I am interested to know . . .
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:54 pm
Subject: tony
u seem like a total fuckin bitch
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 10:15 pm
Subject: tony
Oh lovely . . . Prince Charming is alive and now residing in New Jersey!! Clearly you are as you initially appeared to be – nothing but Jersey trash!
So, in an effort to do you a public service, let me bring a few items to your attention. And don’t worry, I will use common language . . . I know Neanderthal’s do not have a big vocabulary.
1) If you advertise yourself as someone that is solely interested in older women, why are you contacting women younger than you? Or did you not even take the time to check the age listed on my profile? Regardless, the fact that you are into cougars shows that you have serious ‘mommy’ issues that neither I, nor any woman with cognitive powers, would be interested in dealing with. I am sure though that there is a 65 year old woman out there just waiting for you to verbally thrash her. Maybe she can hit you with her cane!
2) If you are really interested in getting to know someone, read the emails that they send back to you. And, braniac, if they ask you a question . . . answer it! What a novel concept! I am not a whore, so I am not going to call you after two one line emails. What would that accomplish? Giving you an opportunity to abuse your two inches of screaming thunder? I don’t think so . . . I am sure there are hookers standing on the corner outside of your Jersey home that can help you out with that for ten dollars.
2) Jersey Shore isn’t looking for additional cast mates. You need to ditch the spray tan, puffy hair, wifebeater, and gold chains. You are 39 years old . . . you look like a retard! And I KNOW that I am not the only one that has told you that. Maybe, just maybe, you should consider a makeover! You are mentally challenged, so maybe a department store out there could hook you up. I have a friend at the Goodwill that I could put you in touch with. What they come up with couldn’t be any worse than the look you are rocking now!
3) NJ Cute Guy? Really? Who told you that? Your momma? Because she is the only one that would find your appearance in any way cute . . . so if you are trying to own the ‘GTL’, I would recommend that you spend a little more time in the gym so that you can get rid of the beer gut. And, clearly, you need to spend considerably little less time in the tanning booth. Oompa-Loompa’s have nothing on you! Freaking orange trash nightmare that you are! Laundry? Yeah . . . the stain on your collar in your picture just validates that you are a filthy pig.
4) Don’t give out your telephone number to women that you are going to verbally abuse! That just shows your complete inability to plan ahead. Now, what should I do with that number? Hmmm hmmm . . . guess you will find out when your phone blows up with calls related to this email (because you have now earned yourself a spot in my Hall of Shame blog series). I will be featuring you! What a great honor for a Jersey boy!
Now that I have shared my wisdom with you, I would suggest that you head out and change your cell phone number . . . because you have no idea the beast you awakened with your foul response to me.
Burn in hell!
~Jenny~
This jackoff was from the dating site that I have a profile on. The site has been good (overall), but these crackheads squeak through with frightening regularity.
So, be warned that the message contains some level of inflammatory comments, including foul language, politically incorrect references to mentally challenged individuals, and attacks on the residents of New Jersey. Please don’t think that I dislike all people in Jersey . . . just those that act like the cast of Jersey Shore. My favorite guy at the moment happens to be from New Jersey and he is nothing like those meatheads!
Enjoy!!! And I did block him . . . you know I had to. Boy did I poke that bear! ;)
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 8:34 pm
Subject: Hi
Hi
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:02 pm
Subject: Hi
Hello . . . thanks for your message. How goes it?
I checked out your profile and you seem to be rather varied in your interests. Can I ask what captured your attention about my profile?
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:14 pm
Subject: tony
it goes good... call me now 609 647 1**5
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:40 pm
Subject: tony
I don't really call people before getting to know them online...I am conservative like that. Did you see my second question in the initial email? I did notice that you mentioned you are always drawn towards older women - of which I am not one since you are five years older than I am. I am interested to know . . .
***
From: NJ_Ugly_Guy
To: Jenny
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 9:54 pm
Subject: tony
u seem like a total fuckin bitch
***
From: Jenny
To: NJ_Ugly_Guy
Date: Dec. 14, 2010 – 10:15 pm
Subject: tony
Oh lovely . . . Prince Charming is alive and now residing in New Jersey!! Clearly you are as you initially appeared to be – nothing but Jersey trash!
So, in an effort to do you a public service, let me bring a few items to your attention. And don’t worry, I will use common language . . . I know Neanderthal’s do not have a big vocabulary.
1) If you advertise yourself as someone that is solely interested in older women, why are you contacting women younger than you? Or did you not even take the time to check the age listed on my profile? Regardless, the fact that you are into cougars shows that you have serious ‘mommy’ issues that neither I, nor any woman with cognitive powers, would be interested in dealing with. I am sure though that there is a 65 year old woman out there just waiting for you to verbally thrash her. Maybe she can hit you with her cane!
2) If you are really interested in getting to know someone, read the emails that they send back to you. And, braniac, if they ask you a question . . . answer it! What a novel concept! I am not a whore, so I am not going to call you after two one line emails. What would that accomplish? Giving you an opportunity to abuse your two inches of screaming thunder? I don’t think so . . . I am sure there are hookers standing on the corner outside of your Jersey home that can help you out with that for ten dollars.
2) Jersey Shore isn’t looking for additional cast mates. You need to ditch the spray tan, puffy hair, wifebeater, and gold chains. You are 39 years old . . . you look like a retard! And I KNOW that I am not the only one that has told you that. Maybe, just maybe, you should consider a makeover! You are mentally challenged, so maybe a department store out there could hook you up. I have a friend at the Goodwill that I could put you in touch with. What they come up with couldn’t be any worse than the look you are rocking now!
3) NJ Cute Guy? Really? Who told you that? Your momma? Because she is the only one that would find your appearance in any way cute . . . so if you are trying to own the ‘GTL’, I would recommend that you spend a little more time in the gym so that you can get rid of the beer gut. And, clearly, you need to spend considerably little less time in the tanning booth. Oompa-Loompa’s have nothing on you! Freaking orange trash nightmare that you are! Laundry? Yeah . . . the stain on your collar in your picture just validates that you are a filthy pig.
4) Don’t give out your telephone number to women that you are going to verbally abuse! That just shows your complete inability to plan ahead. Now, what should I do with that number? Hmmm hmmm . . . guess you will find out when your phone blows up with calls related to this email (because you have now earned yourself a spot in my Hall of Shame blog series). I will be featuring you! What a great honor for a Jersey boy!
Now that I have shared my wisdom with you, I would suggest that you head out and change your cell phone number . . . because you have no idea the beast you awakened with your foul response to me.
Burn in hell!
~Jenny~
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