The Hall of Shame ~ Part XXVIII

Hello one and all! So, spring is here with a vengeance . . . and I am loving it! Can you even stand how nice it is out?!? I know that I am enjoying this light jacket weather (okay, I know most people are sporting shorts already but I am cold all of the time!).

Well, I have a REAL winner for you with this Hall of Shame entry . . . I do so hope that you enjoy it. It comes to you from the dating web site that I have a profile on . . . which, as you probably know, lists me as being ‘in a relationship’ and ‘not available’. Regardless, this crackadoodle didn’t get that memo and really wanted to show his ass – even starting out really badly by insulting me. Read on for a humorous exchange . . . I know that I truly enjoyed it! And, just so you are aware, his screen name wasn’t “EbonyLoser” . . . it was a variation of “EbonyLover” . . . I changed it to protect his dumb behind! Although he really is horrific and deserves to be outed to the public! ;)

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To: Jenny
From: EbonyLoser
Date: 04/02/2010
Subject: Sup?

I checked your page. You arent that pretty and admit to being fat. So tell me why I should be interested in you.

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To: EbonyLoser
From: Jenny
Date: 04/03/2010
Subject: Re: Sup?

Are you kidding me with that email? I am not interested in telling you anything . . . get lost.

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To: Jenny
From: EbonyLoser
Date: 04/03/2010
Subject: Re: Sup?

Not a joke. Im a hot commodity. Why should I date someone like you over the other women on this site? I would like to know.

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To: EbonyLoser
From: Jenny
Date: 04/03/2010
Subject: Re: Sup?

You shouldn’t date me . . . I would never consider you. You are clearly a loser. Now, I said it before, get lost. In addition to not being very pretty and being fat, I’m really not very nice.

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To: Jenny
From: EbonyLoser
Date: 04/03/2010
Subject: Re: Sup?

Not a good response. How do you expect to catch me like that? You big girls like a black man, dont you? I know we like you.

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To: EbonyLoser
From: Jenny
Date: 04/04/2010
Subject: Re: Sup?

I can’t take it . . . really, I tried . . . and I just do not have it in me to let it go any longer. Do you have any idea how unfathomably rude and disgusting you are? Has that pick-up e-mail EVER worked for you? Because if it has, I feel really badly for the pathetic creature that lacked the self-esteem needed in order to shoot your sorry ass to the curb the way that you deserve. Let me just break a few things down for you (if you are capable of reading as much as I am about to write) . . . and then I will block you from contacting me again.

1) You are a hot commodity? In what universe are you hot? I can only imagine that it is your sorry mama telling you that . . . because your pock-filled face is one that ONLY a mother could love. And let me just mention to you that if the only pictures you have of yourself include you sporting stained clothing, you may just want to refrain from posting any at all. No woman wants to date Pigpen. NOT sexy.

2) Why should you want to date someone like me? Well . . . I would have to say because it would be the first sign of common sense that you would ever display. But, the reality is that someone like me – with decency, taste, and class – would never look twice at someone like you and someone like me would NEVER respond positively to such a disrespectful introductory message. You may want to consider some personality training. Whatever ghetto you grew up in must have rubbed off on you . . . but it isn’t something that most women find attractive. I know I don’t!

3) How do I expect to catch you? I think we have established that I am not interested in doing so. In fact, had you actually taken the time to READ my profile, you would see that I am in a relationship and am not pursuing new romantic interests at this time. So, this whole exchange could have been avoided . . . had you just possessed a little attention to detail. And the only way I want to catch you is if I were chasing you down with my car. However, rest assured that in that instance, I would indeed catch you.

4) Big girls like a black man because you like us? Hmm . . . really? What is it that you think is so appealing about you? Being disrespected and treated like absolute garbage? Because I can clearly see the level of respect that you would treat any woman in your life. Your first sentence to me was filled with trash . . . and there is nowhere to go from there but down. In this instance, I think that you saw that I am a big girl and considered me easy target for your abuse. However, you clearly misjudged the situation. I am not one of those weak and pathetic ‘big girls’ that is desperate for any male attention . . . that is willing to cling to your every word and would love to kiss your revolting feet. If that is what you are looking for (and believe me, I know your type), you may want to consider a dog . . . but, somehow I am sure you would abuse an animal just as horribly as you would the woman in your life. An animal I can feel sorry for . . . but any woman that would elect to be with you would just be full-on stupid. And, trust me, I am not that woman.

Now that I have cleared up a few of your outstanding questions, I am going to sign off. I hope that you managed to make it through this lengthy email. I know that I am exceedingly verbose, but I think it would be a valuable use of your time to reflect on the items I mentioned above and see how you can improve yourself. Truly, you could only improve, since you are a giant pile of shit now.

Suck it,
Jenny