Happy Spring everyone! I hope that this blog finds you all happy and healthy . . . I know that I am feeling particularly buoyant at the change in season. Naturally I am sure that it has a lot to do with my awesome life, but that’s neither here nor there! ;)
I have another installment of the Hall of Shame for you today . . . and since it just came in last night, I couldn’t keep it to myself! It’s rather amusing to me that I have started to get snarky emails from people so quickly related to my weight loss . . . I had several friends warn me that I would get them, but I never expected them to start so soon. But, now that they have, I confess that I am truly surprised at the tone of the messages . . . and how truly bizarre some people are. Realistically, people are supposed to be supportive when you lose weight, regardless of how you do it, not try to drag you down. So, to those people that aren’t going to like me in a smaller size, you may want to make a note and delete me now . . . because it is a reality.
This guy, who I swear that I do not know in real life, was on my MySpace page for about three years (at least according to him). We used to send occasional email messages . . . but never anything particularly personal and we NEVER had a romantic relationship, which is why his message below was so freakish to me. How he wasted so much time on me I will never understand, but that’s his issue too. Obviously, his name has been changed to protect the insane . . . but he is a real person . . . and if you are on my MySpace friends list and are a BBW, he might be on yours too! He was notorious for going through friend lists and adding other BBWs that he thinks are attractive. Overall he is harmless . . . at least until you try to get skinny! *evil laugh*
Enjoy!
****
To: Jenny
From: A-Hole
Date: March 24, 2009 7:30 PM
Subject: Farewell
Dear Jenny,
It pains me to write this, but I am going to be deleting you from my page after three years. I see a lot of things going on that I do not like at all and I’m not sure what is going on. What did you do? You are not looking like yourself and I don’t know what to say about that. I thought you were a proud BBW, which is why I was drawn to you, but it appears I was wrong. I’m sorry now that I wasted so much time with you because you are just like everyone else turning aside from your friends when you learn you have a pretty face. It isn’t up for debate, but I wanted to explain.
Be well,
A-Hole
*****
To: A-Hole
From: Jenny
Date: March 24, 2009 8:20 PM
Subject: Re: Farewell
Dear A-Hole:
It’s rather interesting to me that you feel you have the privilege to determine what compromises a proud BBW. The last time that I checked, you were not a card-carrying member of the Fat Acceptance movement . . . so perhaps you jump down off of your soapbox and get a grip on reality. No one really cares about your pathetic little opinion . . . certainly not me! Do you think that I needed an explanation for why you were deleting me or that I would have even missed you from my page? I can assure you that I would neither have missed you nor would I have suffered mental anguish from never knowing why I was axed from your life.
And since when do I need to check in with anyone about things that I do with my life? Do I need to now ask permission with my status message before I change my hair? Or buy a new pair of shoes? I think that your sense of entitlement has slipped into a world of delusion and you might want to try to take a step into the real world for a second. You do not know anything about me or about my life . . . nor would you ever have the right to comment on any decisions that I make about it. I have always been proud of the person that I am – regardless of my weight. Big or small I am always going to be an AMAZING woman. You are not going to be able to disparage me with your small mind and even smaller words.
Want to know what I really think? I am ecstatic that you are going to take your little fat fetish elsewhere . . . because I’m not any more interested in it now than I was three years ago when you became my ‘friend’.
In closing, I would wish you well . . . but you have to know that you don’t deserve it. But, you have now earned yourself a place in my illustrious Hall of Shame blog series. Enjoy your shining moment of glory! Somehow, I think it will be the only five seconds of fame that your lifetime will bring.
Jenny
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
The Hall of Shame ~ Part XIX
Greetings all! On this wonderfully snowy day in Pennsylvania, I am bringing you a long overdue entry from the Hall of Shame! When I received this email yesterday, I just knew that I had to include it . . . and I know that I have been neglecting you all terribly, but I shall try to be better . . . promise!
So, read below for the email from the loser du jour and then my response directly to him . . . he was actually one of my friends for years and then disappeared from my list. I will admit that I didn’t miss him or anything, but it is all the same to me when you have as many friends as I do, you know? People delete their pages all of the time and I have no control over that. I can’t stalk everyone every day!!! Anyway, I have to say that I found the whole thing pretty amusing!!! Check it out!
***
To: Jenny
From: Wackadoo Crackadoo
Date: March 1, 2009 2:30 pm
Subject: U think ur special
So what u lose some wait and then u think that u are to special to talk wit ur friends? U deleted me from ur page? Thats sum serius shit thur! I wuz ur friend 4 a long time n then u go n delet me like im nutin 2 u? I always had luv 4 u n tried 2 be there 4 u always n u nvr wanted to b wit me. So I got tired of waitn around for u. So now im the bad guy? Thats sum shit girl n u no it! I jus wanted u 2 no that I no wat u r abot now n I dont want no part of it. U arnt rigt n I no it.
***
To: Wackadoo Crackadoo
From: Jenny
Date: March 1, 2009 8:30 pm
Subject: Re: U think ur special
Well, dear heart, I don’t just think that I am special . . . I know that I am and, believe me, I am not looking for validation of that fact from someone of your stature. And, just to expound on that for you, I am not short bus special like you are – with your ghetto grammar, spelling, punctuation, and sentence structure.
Let me just break it down for you and then I will let you get on with your craptacular life (and since you were my ‘friend’ for so long, you will know that you just earned yourself a spot in my Hall of Shame blog series with this email). You should be honored . . . not every loser is so fortunate!
1) When someone loses pounds, it is spelled ‘weight’, not ‘wait’. Wait is what you do when you are standing in line for your short bus every morning.
2) I never, ever gave you any indication that you should wait around for me. When I told you that I wanted to be friends, you should have believed what I said. Sometimes people say that to be nice and avoid hurting your feelings. Apparently I should have just hurt your feelings . . . because I guess you didn’t get the hint. You are right that I didn’t want to be with you . . . and never would. No woman with two brain cells to rub together would make that mistake.
3) I didn’t delete you from my page. You actually deleted me from yours. So, maybe you should get your facts straight before having a meltdown like a whiny little bitch. Either way, though, I am glad because it helped me to see your true colors. You are no ‘friend’ of mine. You are less than nothing to me and I am so glad that you helped to clarify that. Good riddance!
4) You know what I’m about? You think so? Really? What might that be? Decency and living an upright life as a productive member of society? The last time I checked, you were gainfully unemployed and had two children with two different women. What are you about? Leeching off of society and populating the world? Somehow I think that I am the winner here.
5) Last, and certainly not least, I am not right? Hmmm . . . I think that we have established that you cannot possibly have the mental prowess to judge me as being ‘wrong’ in any way, shape, or form . . . so I am going to just close with an encouragement for you to run, not walk, to the nearest physician for a vasectomy as soon as possible. You have done enough damage with your genes. Stop the madness now!
And, in case you were wondering, you have now been blocked from contacting me. So trying to write back to me will be a fruitless endeavor. Jut another helpful hit, if you need to look up any of the words that I have used in this response, you can use www.dictionary.com.
Jenny Out!
So, read below for the email from the loser du jour and then my response directly to him . . . he was actually one of my friends for years and then disappeared from my list. I will admit that I didn’t miss him or anything, but it is all the same to me when you have as many friends as I do, you know? People delete their pages all of the time and I have no control over that. I can’t stalk everyone every day!!! Anyway, I have to say that I found the whole thing pretty amusing!!! Check it out!
***
To: Jenny
From: Wackadoo Crackadoo
Date: March 1, 2009 2:30 pm
Subject: U think ur special
So what u lose some wait and then u think that u are to special to talk wit ur friends? U deleted me from ur page? Thats sum serius shit thur! I wuz ur friend 4 a long time n then u go n delet me like im nutin 2 u? I always had luv 4 u n tried 2 be there 4 u always n u nvr wanted to b wit me. So I got tired of waitn around for u. So now im the bad guy? Thats sum shit girl n u no it! I jus wanted u 2 no that I no wat u r abot now n I dont want no part of it. U arnt rigt n I no it.
***
To: Wackadoo Crackadoo
From: Jenny
Date: March 1, 2009 8:30 pm
Subject: Re: U think ur special
Well, dear heart, I don’t just think that I am special . . . I know that I am and, believe me, I am not looking for validation of that fact from someone of your stature. And, just to expound on that for you, I am not short bus special like you are – with your ghetto grammar, spelling, punctuation, and sentence structure.
Let me just break it down for you and then I will let you get on with your craptacular life (and since you were my ‘friend’ for so long, you will know that you just earned yourself a spot in my Hall of Shame blog series with this email). You should be honored . . . not every loser is so fortunate!
1) When someone loses pounds, it is spelled ‘weight’, not ‘wait’. Wait is what you do when you are standing in line for your short bus every morning.
2) I never, ever gave you any indication that you should wait around for me. When I told you that I wanted to be friends, you should have believed what I said. Sometimes people say that to be nice and avoid hurting your feelings. Apparently I should have just hurt your feelings . . . because I guess you didn’t get the hint. You are right that I didn’t want to be with you . . . and never would. No woman with two brain cells to rub together would make that mistake.
3) I didn’t delete you from my page. You actually deleted me from yours. So, maybe you should get your facts straight before having a meltdown like a whiny little bitch. Either way, though, I am glad because it helped me to see your true colors. You are no ‘friend’ of mine. You are less than nothing to me and I am so glad that you helped to clarify that. Good riddance!
4) You know what I’m about? You think so? Really? What might that be? Decency and living an upright life as a productive member of society? The last time I checked, you were gainfully unemployed and had two children with two different women. What are you about? Leeching off of society and populating the world? Somehow I think that I am the winner here.
5) Last, and certainly not least, I am not right? Hmmm . . . I think that we have established that you cannot possibly have the mental prowess to judge me as being ‘wrong’ in any way, shape, or form . . . so I am going to just close with an encouragement for you to run, not walk, to the nearest physician for a vasectomy as soon as possible. You have done enough damage with your genes. Stop the madness now!
And, in case you were wondering, you have now been blocked from contacting me. So trying to write back to me will be a fruitless endeavor. Jut another helpful hit, if you need to look up any of the words that I have used in this response, you can use www.dictionary.com.
Jenny Out!
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